Making the Ride Worthwhile

My friend Copper is pretty laid back. It doesn't take much to make him happy - feed him, rub his belly, play tug-of-war and he'll be your buddy. He's pretty low-maintenance, which is great for me. He lays around most of the time and alerts me whenever anyone comes to the door (or walks by the house for that matter).

Now, what's that saying... "You gotta take the good with the bad"?

Well, Copper's "bad" included licking his legs raw, random bleeding of his belly, and a fist sized fatty tumor on his side. To top that all off, after a visit to the vet, I found out he had 2 abscessed teeth! He was definitely a sight!

After a couple months of allergy meds, the leg licking has stopped and the hair has grown back. So I decided to go ahead and schedule the surgery to have the teeth cleaned and tumor removed since he'd be sedated already... plus I felt bad for him since everyone makes fun of him when they see it. I didn't want him to be the loser dog with the weird growth. The Quasimodo of the dog world. The only good thing about the tumor was that someone told me it felt like a breast implant. Seeing as I haven't felt one (nor do I plan to), I guess that would kill any curiosity I could potentially have in the future.

I dropped him off at the vet yesterday morning. I get a call later that afternoon. The tumor was removed with no problems and the teeth were pulled, but the vet found a small growth on his belly. He removed the growth and needed to send it off to be analyzed. I should get the test results by the end of the week.

I picked Copper up from the vet this morning and was told by the vet to that I could take the neck cone off and as long as I was watching him, he should be fine. Well I come home and after a few hours, I get tired of looking at him give me those big sad puppy eyes. I give in. I take off the cone.

Big mistake.

I get up to make a little dinner. Snow had just started to fall again and I was craving homemade chicken noodle soup. In the 2 minutes that I look away, I hear a licking sound. I turn and see Copper, licking at his staples. I drop my knife, run over to Copper with my flour & dough covered hands. I see 2 staples lying on the kitchen floor and a gaping wound where they once were.

I make a quick call to the vet. I get the machine. Of course. Luckily the Emergency Veterinarian Center is right down the street and I don't have to drive very far in the icy roads. I walked in and the waiting room is empty. I am directed to an observation room, where the vet informs me that due to the nature of the wound, he will have to sedate him to replace the staples.

The entire time, this is what Copper looks like:

He would not stop smiling! It's as if he was finding some kind of enjoyment in emptying out my pocketbook! "Haha Abby! You think I'm low-maintenance?! I'll show you! "

I go back to the waiting room and that's when the excitement begins. A woman and her teenage daughter are holding a small grey dog wearing a leopard print jacket and a large gash under one eye. The woman was bowling, her dog decided to run in front of the ball. The dog was fine... until another dog at her house decided to attack the smaller one!

Next to the bowling dog is a Great Dane. He is just a puppy according to the owners, but he sits almost eye to eye with me. Mr. Great Dane sees a smaller dog and lets out the loudest bark I have ever heard in my life. I am pretty sure that dog could eat me for breakfast.

There is a couple sitting next to me. The woman - a older, red-headed, pre-TrimSpa version of Anna Nicole Smith - is pacing up and down the hall, balling her eyes out. She looks across the room. The woman holding a guinea pig against her blood covered shirt asks what happened. Anna Nicole's "baby boy" doesn't look good. After sending her husband into the cold to get his "baby blanket" from the car (the dog, not the husband's), she informs Ms. Guinea Pig that their baby is a 14 year old long-haired Chihuahua. He is in an oxygen tank in the back, they are making calls informing their family members and friends that he's not going to make it. The husband comes back, sits down and looks just plain apathetic about the whole situation. (Perhaps he knows he's not the real father...) Soon after, the vet calls them back to say their goodbyes.

A young couple walks in with their 5 month old Pomeranian. His blood sugar is low. He is rushed into a room where he is hooked up to an IV.

The vet comes out to let me know that everything went fine with Copper. While he is getting him, Anna Nicole's husband comes into the waiting room and heads toward the exit. As I look at him, I hear a LOUD wail behind him and see him halfway rolling his eyes. Anna Nicole is behind him, holding their lifeless "baby" in her arms. She can not keep her composure, stopping every 2 steps to look at her dog. I have paid my bill and am standing by the check-in counter. Anna Nicole stops right next to me, tears streaming down her face, and we lock eyes. She stands there for a few seconds and I have no clue what to do. Shoot, I only know about her "baby" because of my mad eavesdropping skills. She's looking at me like she wants a hug. Like she needs an arm around her. And although I felt really bad for her and I would be extremely sad if I was in her position, all I could think was, "That dead dog's eyes are open! The dead dog is staring at me!" It was the most awkward moment ever.